I was nine when I said I wanted to die.
I was sent for counselling but it didn’t help much. I was blamed and told things which made me feel guilty. After bad experiences via phone help lines and counsellors I didn’t have many answers.
When I was 15 the bullying I received at school intensified. I left when I was 16. I fell into depressive states and was sent to other counsellors. I didn’t understand why I felt so much pain.
I briefly tried another school, visiting another counsellor to have an awful, cold experience. I didn’t get the help I needed.
I went to several therapists after that and finally got a diagnosis which made sense; a social phobia which makes my life crippling.
I can’t stand being looked at or approaching others for fear of judgment. I have felt this way all my life.
I had bad experiences with other therapists. I’m now 25 and every one has been a horror story. I’ve been in several respites and tried everything I can, but it just goes wrong.
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